Chrysalis

Why can’t the damn world just shut down: pitch black darkness to engulf the world? I wouldn't want to hear a sound. I would wish muteness would strike the world and a chill to straighten everybody’s spines in trepidation. Wouldn’t that be splendid!

Finally after all this soul searching, I’d finally have peace of mind. I would come around to recharging the batteries of my brain and reboot my system so that I may work through whatever the hell’s made my life so complicated.

Then and then only would I hope to get rid of this nagging self-defeating urge to hurt myself. Or somebody else. Maybe then would I forgive myself for being soft in a hard world; weak in a man’s world.

I would love to purge myself of all this self-doubt, unconfidence and morbid almost-tangible nape raising fear of something as elusive as the air that I breathe~ MYSELF.

I delude myself that if I lived too long inside my brain, the whole world would give way to oblivion: that everybody would blur into the sunset. It would be me, myself and a lifetime of self-conceited indulgence. That would be splendid!